Thursday, 11 July 2013

A new start

"Why why why" she asked herself every night before going to sleep. 
"Why do things like this happen to me? Why am i cursed with this life? Why can't i be happy like i use to be? Will i ever be happy?"
As tears streamed down her pale cheeks, she covered her face with a pillow and screamed into it as hard as possible. Screaming into her pillow always seemed to calm her down.
Putting the pillow aside, she pulled the blanket close to her face, closed her eyes and said "I wish tomorrow won't come. I don't want to face another day. I don't want to dream about having a better life when Im just cursed with sorrow."
Flat on bed in a room that was jet black, she stared up at the roof while thought after though rushed through her head. This was what she's been going through every night since a few months now.

Usually her dark nights were followed by miserable mornings, but today wasn't like that. Instead of waking up feeling fed up of "life", She woke up feeling fed up of  "allowing people to make her life miserable". 
"No" she said.."I've lived according to your will for to long. I've allowed you to push me around to much. I've allowed these thoughts to destroy me and it has done more damage than expected. But no, not anymore." 
Searching for a pen and a piece of paper, she wrote down everything that went through her dark mind each night. She wrote down the things that left her in tears, the things that made her wish for death. She wrote down every little thing that has bothered her. She poured her heart into that piece of paper. 
She then took a lighter and started to burn the papers. As the paper started to burn, she could feel all her worries inside her burn to. 

She let out a big sigh of relief and opened her curtains. A bright ray of sunlight shot through her window. She squinted her eyes as the sunlight hit her face and smiled. Yes she actually smiled, and it was a real smile. She has forgotten what it actually felt like but now that she knows, she never wanted to stop smiling. 
"It's time to start living for myself. Its time to start living the life I always wanted."

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2 comments:

  1. There is so much darkness but u saw the sun still shines on our path... I like the u express things

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  2. i just admire your way of expressing things in writting xx

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